Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Pregnant and out of control...Part I

I feel obligated to warn you, the following article contains what some may consider T.M.I. Pregnancy has all but demolished my modesty and I really wanted this to be as honest as possible! I am sure some of you can relate, some of you will find humor, and some of you may never read my blog again. This is a chance I am willing to take. Carry on...

In the early days, when my husband and I decided to try for a baby, I found myself frequently wondering and hoping that the changes I have made to my health and lifestyle would have a positive affect on some of the less than desirable pregnancy symptoms I had read about (and begun to dread). Let me be the first to tell you that since my body has been taken over by the life-sucking parasite precious life growing inside me, this is simply NOT THE CASE. Thus far, it seems that the only thing health has had a positive effect on was fertility. 

Case in point:
Hubby and I stop trying to prevent pregnancy in February. A couple of months go by and nothing happens. In April, we make an active attempt at it and POOF, four weeks later the test came back positive. For anyone who knows Kevin, his response may make you laugh... "It's too soon, I need more proof..." And just like that, the fun part was over.

Please don't mistake me here, we were ecstatic. I knew I was "late" and was waiting for that optimal morning pee to confirm it, so of course I was restless and broke out the test around at 5 a.m. Positive! Woke the hubby up and his first reply was a happy smile followed by, "that's awesome, will you still be pregnant in two hours?" An early preview of the kid on Christmas, I believe.

Due to a large family, and the ever-growing popularity of social networking, we made the decision to not tell anyone until the chance of miscarriage was lower, around 12 weeks. We made it about 8 of these weeks. Ok, ok, so I called my sisters and my mom like two days after I found out. Then felt bad so I confessed my sins to the hubby. Then felt worse and had to call his mom...and it went from there. The Facebook world may not have known until 12 weeks, but I can't be sure. So the first trimester begins.

The First Trimester:
I would like to start my saying I feel I was extremely lucky in the morning sickness department. Apart from a few instances of nausea, I never actually threw up and feel as if I dodged a cannonball as opposed to the usual bullet. Thank you Lord!

     False Hope
I felt pretty amazing the first 8 weeks or so. I actually felt stronger in the gym, and my energy was surged on my excitement and happiness. Slowly but surely, this energy began to disappear. For those of you who know me well, I operate on a pretty fast pace during my waking hours. It has been one of the many wonderful things about healthy lifestyle I have taken on. Around week 9-10, I found myself wanting naps for the first time in over a year. In an effort to listen to my body, I grabbed a nap as often as possible and am pretty sure I took more naps in two months that I had in the entire previous year. It was wonderful and frustrating at the same time. I love my life, my job and my energy levels. Again, for those of you who know me well, I am a bit of a control freak; so being exhausted all the time was extremely hard for me. I am fortunate to have flexible job hours that allowed me the time to sneak in the naps.

     The Super Smeller
While I did escape the full blown morning sickness, I learned that a heightened sense of smell can still lead to bouts of nausea and unexpected food aversions. The worst one happened way to close to home...it was the first time in 13 years that I realized how bad my husbands feet smell.

Just when you think you know someone so well...I only recently learned that he does not wear socks with his gym shoes. Seriously?!?! I have presently lost count of how many time I have almost thrown his damn shoes in the trash. I have set them outside a time or two, shut them in a spare room...the smell still lingers for hours. All threats of washing them were met a death stare and complaints about ruining the perfect fit. **I have to add here that the day before I was finally ready to publish this post, Kevin washed his shoes. I was in shock...until we realized that it didn't really seem to help...

The only other dramatic thing I ran into may have ruined me on asparagus forever...One of the gym locations I work at is next to a catering business and there was one day they were cooking something that smelled like overcooked, canned asparagus (aka dirty socks). I had to leave the building that day and the first thing I did when I got home was freeze the fresh asparagus I had just bought at the market a few days before. I have not even been able to stomach the thought of it since.

     Weird cravings? 
Maybe...I went through a phase where the only thing that sounded good was grapefruit or a combination of sweet potato, ground beef and eggs...kind of like a hash, but absolutely no seasoning allowed. The only thing that has really stuck around is my hankering for sweet potatoes. I have had to fight off many many ice cream cravings, managing to keep the indulgences at a minimum. As disgruntled as this makes me, my midwife insists my body will thank me later.

The Second Trimester:

    The Proverbial "Break"
I have had a lot of women tell me that the second trimester is the best. I had read/heard about a surge of energy and was very much looking forward to that. I quickly learned that the surge of energy for me just meant I wanted only one nap a day as opposed to two. A second round of applause for a flexible work schedule!

Nausea mercifully dissipated, only to be replaced by severe cramping (technically termed "round ligament pains"), which put another dent in my desired activity level. Workouts were becoming harder and long walks were pretty much out. Talk about learning to relinquish my control issues. My mom insists that this is good for me. I am not sure I am sold on this yet.

     Patience eludes me
I usually pride myself on my tolerance for people, my patience with my loved ones, and the ability to tune out the stuff that bothers me. This all seems to have been completely shut off. In fact, I am almost convinced the world has gotten dumber in the past few months. I would like to enter a disclaimer here: I apologize in advance for snapping at you, being short with you, or making some snarky comment that should have been kept inside my head. This applies to friends, family members, gym members and helpless passersby on the street. This is a temporary situation!


     Everybody poops...except me
Everybody Poops is one of my favorite children's books. Pregnant women are not mentioned in this book...for good reason. It took me weeks of trial and error, but I finally nailed down a blended concoction of aloe juice, tons of green veggies and a side shot of Braggs apple cider vinegar, topped with a probiotic that seems to keep things moving.
(Anyone interested in the exact recipe, message me for details - please note, palatable taste is not included.)

     The good stuff
Knowing it could finally hear us made me start to worry that the baby would think all I do is yell. I spend all day yelling in front of fitness classes, then come home and spend the evening yelling at the dogs. I felt I had to remedy this is a hurry and have been giving the little one a nightly dose of Bob Marley's Three Little Birds, along with some other soft-voiced sentiments. It is truly amazing how much love I already feel for the little bugger.

Week 15 was when I felt the first little flutters in my belly. I quickly began to look forward to the time I spend daily, sitting in concentrated silence, waiting for those little kicks...that quickly grew into big kicks. Soon enough I didn't even have to focus anymore, and now I can see my belly move from the outside!

Does this make it all of the above crap (or lack-there-of) worth it? Every. Single. Bit.

The Third Trimester: 
To come! I feel as if I have taken enough of your time for now :) Stay tuned for Part II!



Monday, October 28, 2013

Find and Embrace Your Process

"A goal is nothing without an action"
Setting goals and finding your cause is something we really encourage our  members to do at Eupraxia. But what do you think happens to those goals if you do not take steps to reach them?
"Eating healthy" and "getting into shape" are not really things that tangibly exist. Only the process of getting, preparing, and eating good food exists. The process of lacing up your shoes, getting to the gym and working as hard as you can is what is real. The goal is just the projected future in your head, so it becomes up to you to find the motivation and the mindset to take the steps towards action!

"Learn to love your process!"
If you toss and turn all night dreading that early workout, only to drag yourself out the door because you feel like it's "something you have to do" then your fitness goals instantly become a lot harder to reach. If you feel like you have to go out of your way to get healthier food and spend all that time preparing it, you will have a harder time attaining optimal health.Then, in the end, even if you did still manage to reach your goals, the journey would have not been a pleasant one, and all of this unpleasantness would be entirely unnecessary!
I am a firm believer that there is something to enjoy in almost every instance in life, and your personal perspective is often all that needs to change. If you learn to love the drive to the gym, the warm-up time when you can chat with a friend, or even the whole workout, then this becomes something you look forward to. If you start to enjoy the process of selecting the best tomato or cut of meat and the time to yourself in the kitchen cooking, you are already on your way to being healthier! 
Doing something we find no love or value in, just to get to our imagined future, is only making things harder than they need to be.
"What we truly need to do is often what we most feel like avoiding"  -David Allen
Resistance happens, and often we resist things that we know are good for us. Recognizing that it is a choice we personally make gives us the power to change it. The power to break a habit or stop one from forming.
The truth is, there is one thing you always have and that is the present moment action. If that action is driven by a goal, we get to choose which way to turn. You can't "do" a goal, but you can do the tasks that lead to it. Choose to keep moving towards your goal! Allowing yourself to feel the joy in your process will ultimately lead towards self-compassion, and steps to greater health. Commitment and dedication are what turn dreams into reality!

Stay Healthy!
~Lindsay